Challenging The Norms: Redefining Success & Overcoming Societal Pressures

You know that nagging feeling that societal norms are holding you back from reaching your full potential in life and business? Yeah, today we're going there! ;-)

We'll reveal those deeply ingrained beliefs about education, career, marriage, and homeownership and how they could be stifling your progress. Fueled by personal anecdotes, including my own experience with the pressures I placed on my daughter regarding college, we'll give you a fresh perspective on whether success truly lies down these well-trodden paths.

But wait, we're not done yet! We're also taking on that giant monster lurking in our pocket...social media. Let's ditch that quantity-driven mindset and focus on what truly matters - quality.

I'll also share a radical approach to running your business - one that sparks joy instead of leaving you drained.

And for those of you with a side hustle, or dreaming of one, we'll explore how it's not just about extra cash, but also about finding and fulfilling your personal calling. So, let's buckle up, challenge the norms, and redefine what success can be.

Join The 5D CEO Society here at the low price of $397 (for 12 months) before it goes up! You'll have monthly live Q&A calls with me, healings infused with RRT, guest speakers, and a full course to help you quantum leap in life and business. 

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:00

Hello and welcome to the 5D CFO podcast. My name is Angela Marie Christian and my mission is to help entrepreneurs and thought leaders rise to the 5D, where we can find wealth in all dimensions, in all areas of life Enjoy. Hello and welcome to the 5D CFO podcast. Today I have something a little different for you, but I just felt really called to share this because it's been helping me recently and I would love to share it in case and I'm hoping it will help you as well. So for today's episode, I really want to talk about a lot of the BS We've been fed pretty much our whole lives and how it can translate to holding us back, not just in business but in life. And I'm not talking just about the BS like get good grades, go to college, go to good job, etc. I will talk about that. But after I talk about that very basic foundational BS, I'm going to then move to a few things in the entrepreneurial online space that I've noticed and that I used to believe and follow, and I no longer find that useful for me anymore, and if someone hadn't brought it to my attention, I might be still feeding into that, which was completely draining. So first let's dive into the most obvious ones, like the ones I just mentioned. Then we'll get to the business ones.

Speaker 1: 1:36

So, growing up, instead of hearing in my household, instead of hearing get good grades, go to college, get a good job, I heard get good grades, get a good job, get married. No one in my family had gone to college and you only know what you know, so I don't blame them at all. I was the first to go to college and graduate. I put myself through a master's program so I have an MBA. This was not a value of theirs going to college, but for some reason I just had this like fire inside of me as a teenager and it was a huge value of mine. I knew I would go to college and I saw myself getting a PhD. Who knows, maybe I still will. But somehow I figured out in my little small town.

Speaker 1: 2:28

At the age of 16, I started applying to colleges and universities on the East Coast. I just wanted to get as far away from Northern California as possible. And now look at me, I'm back here and I love it. But you know, I even got some amazing scholarships, especially to this one school in New York that I really wanted to go to, but of course I couldn't go because my mother didn't want me that far away. And, as a mother myself dealing with my daughter, my oldest daughter is in her first year of college and is now going to be moving to Southern California. I totally get it, but I'm not going to try to control her, I'm going to support her and that's just something, you know, I learned from my own childhood. So I really want to break that down, because a lot of us heard these, heard this just like getting drilled into us get good grades, go to college, get a good job, get married, buy a house like pick and choose which ones align with your childhood. So let's think about this does getting great good grades really ensure that you'll get into a good college? In my experience, no.

Speaker 1: 3:42

My oldest daughter went to a fancy private college prep high school. She had a 4.6 GPA. She was cheerleading captain. She was on that cheer team for four years. She was on all of these different teams. She was very involved in her school and and not only that, but she wrote these amazing essays and I'm not just saying that because I'm her mother. She is actually, in fact, a very, very gifted writer.

Speaker 1: 4:12

So she applied to three UC schools UCLA, ucsb and UCSD In addition to some safety schools. She didn't get into a single UC school. Like what? What does that teach our children? I was so angry, why couldn't one of the UCs accept her, right? I was so mad and then I was like you know what? It's probably for the better, because college doesn't ensure success and those UC schools are very expensive, right?

Speaker 1: 4:44

So she did get accepted to San Diego State, but she was just feeling really deflated and decided to enroll at a junior college nearby and I was really okay with that and I know that she it took a like her self-esteem took a big hit and I just felt so bad. For it's like God. I put all this pressure on her unknowingly, like go to the school. You know she was at the top of her class and she still didn't get into UCLA, which is what's her dream school since age four. And it just made me think like, not that we shouldn't be, you know, encouraging our children to get good grades, but maybe we need to stop telling them that that's what all that matters, right? I just feel like kids are way, way under way too much pressure right now and that's not going to serve them, and it's not going to serve anybody, because not only does she regret putting so much time and effort into getting you know, she was in AP classes, honors classes. She took Latin for three years, not just at that school, but at a prior school too, and so you know she knows ancient Greek, she knows Latin. It's like how did she not get into a UC school? And I just kept asking myself that, and I'm like you know what, though it is as it should be. It was a big learning lesson. I will not pressure my other two children I won't pay enormous amounts of money for them to go to fancy private college prep schools. It was just a big learning lesson, right?

Speaker 1: 6:22

So now let's talk about getting a good job. Does that ensure success? Absolutely not. Just think about all the people out there that have worked really hard I'm talking about, like teachers, janitors, construction workers. Does having a good job ensure success? No, in fact, it pretty much ensures that your income is going to be capped, that you have no control over your income or very little. You work really hard for someone else and hopefully retire someday and enjoy life at 65, but that's not a guarantee. I know someone recently who just retired and found out they had brain cancer and had a year to live, and this was supposed to be the time where they get to go enjoy life. And I'm not saying that to scare you, but it's really important that we enjoy life now, not like as some future thing. And there's no such thing as job security. I was at a firm for seven years a financial and accounting firm and I was one of the first people there. I helped shape it. I just thought I had like job security and one day management changed and I would no longer had a job and I'm not saying this to scare you and it all worked out for the best.

Speaker 1: 7:41

But I do believe in these days, or in these times, a side hustle is like essential, not just for the income piece of it, but for really, like establishing your own power, control, freedom and figuring out what you're here for, like we were all put on this earth at this time to do something. So what is it? What like really inspires you, what makes you feel passion Like just take some time, sit in silence and really figure that out. And there's so many people that are needing help from others and I'm sure that well, I know there's something that you have learned or gone through that you could help others with. So, whatever that is, you could turn into a side hustle, I guarantee it. So, okay, now let's talk about society, the norm of getting married, feeling this pressure Don't even get me started here.

Speaker 1: 8:44

I was kind of a rebel here for a long time and I actually had like probably five or six people that proposed to me that I said, well, I said yes to it first but then ended up calling it off because I just like it was such a huge commitment and I didn't take it lightly and it just didn't feel like the right time to actually listen to my intuition surprisingly at that younger during my younger years, because I didn't listen to it in a lot of other ways. But I found myself during COVID because of something that had happened that I was going through with my middle child. I was already in a really like fearful state and really going down a dark path because of something that was happening with her, and I allowed that fear to take over my life and I decided to believe that the world might end. So I decided, well, at the time I think I was 39. And so I was like, well, I don't wanna leave this world not being married. Well, why would I wanna marry someone just because I think the world is ending and really being connected to someone? That wasn't a good match for me if the world didn't, it's like I don't know what I was thinking. I really wish I had saved that for someone truly deserving and worthy. But, of course, it was a huge learning lesson and it all happened because that's the way it was supposed to happen and although, like now, after going through divorce, I would never legally want to get married again, well, I do reserve the right to change my mind at any time, as you should as well. I'll just say I would love to get married in like, I would love to do the marriage ceremony and commit to someone, but I don't know that I'd want to get legally entangled with another person again because this was such a mess. But we shall see. What I'd really love is for Disney and other Hollywood movies to stop romanticizing like getting married. The focus should really be more on, like the marriage, and we just put our society just puts way too much energy and focus on just like the day of the wedding, the party, instead of really figuring out like are you a good match? And if you're well, let me just say my next episode is with my psychic, amy Conner, and we're talking about how relationships can actually detract or enhance your life's purpose, your business, your success. So if you're feeling any sensations around your relationship right now, definitely listen to that. It will be coming out next.

Speaker 1: 11:35

So then let's talk about buying a house. So this is definitely not as easy as it used to be and since we weren't taught any basic financial management skills in high school or even in college and I have an MBA many people end up in serious debt because they're just trying to check this off the box. Right, they're just trying to? Or I said that wrong? They're just trying to check this box. Yeah, I don't know why that sounds so weird. I haven't owned a house yet and I'm 43 and I'm fine with it. I know that when the timing is right, I'll buy, but I've been a freaking gypsy my whole adult life, like it's hard for me to stay in one place more than two years.

Speaker 1: 12:16

So for me to buy a house, I'm gonna have to be like, yes, a whole body, hell, yes, but when someone purchases a house because they're following societal norms, it's usually the house becomes more of a liability than an asset, because a house isn't an asset truly unless it's making you money. If you are barely surviving each month and have trouble paying your mortgage, it's not an asset. I know someone who owns two houses can barely afford to live, and it's like. Sell the freaking houses, you know it's like or rent them out, do something instead of just. They're so stuck in being, you know, comfortable, like they don't wanna step out into the unknown, and what I've realized is sometimes I can stand on a soapbox and say these things, and so I really need, I'm really working on saying these things with more compassion, and I think it's because I'm so passionate about it, because I used to think all of this too, and so, just as who I am, sometimes it can come across as like condescending, and that's not like my intention at all.

Speaker 1: 13:31

I'm just like, oh my God, I wish someone would have woken me up years ago, you know. So that's where it's coming from, and so, if this is you, any of this is you like that's nothing bad, it's like it's just what we were taught and, sorry, someone was walking by and waved to me. So now let's talk about a few norms in this online space that I really don't agree with anymore, but I did use to buy into it, and what I'm saying I'm not claiming is the ultimate truth. This is just what's been useful for me, and so you can choose to take it or leave it. I'm just here to share because I really want to reduce the stress and the pressure of people, because I do believe all of this stress and pressure and fear is what's making our world so volatile and violent, and so true change starts with each person, starts with you, and when you start waking up to I mean really I can't think of a better way of saying it just like breaking out of this matrix, this simulation. It's like what? Why were we told all of these things? Because our parents were told them, so nobody's fault, it's just. Well. I would say, wow, I won't say that actually. So let's get into this.

Speaker 1: 14:57

So how about let's stop putting pressure on people to post on social media consistently, whether they feel like it or not? How about, instead, let's celebrate people who actually only show up when they're following that rich energy of, or passion of, what they have to say, and I've seen so many entrepreneurs completely burnt out because they are trying to follow this consistency on social media when it doesn't feel energetically aligned, and I was one of them until I met my amazing mentor, andrea Crowder. She has completely shifted my view on almost everything, like in life and business, and this was one of them and someone in one of our groups I'm in several of her programs and in one of our group calls this woman had mentioned she hadn't been on social media for like three weeks because she was really sick and she was worried that her followers might have lost trust in her or she was worried about, like, all of a sudden returning. She didn't know how to just return and Andrea said it's so cute that you think that you've been noticed. And she wasn't saying that to be rude, it's just very true.

Speaker 1: 16:09

People are so consumed with their own lives they aren't going to notice if you aren't consistent on social media. The only person or thing that will notice is the algorithm. Sure, but like, take that pressure off yourself, celebrate yourself for choosing you over social media. Like, I only post when I'm feeling that rich energy or playful energy or fun. I no longer post just to make the algorithm happy, I'm no longer subscribing to that, and so I hope, if I hope that takes some pressure off of you. Like I'm not a social media guru, like I don't have a ton of followers, but I feel like the people who do follow me are people that you know want to learn more, want to live in the same kind of aligned life, and so I would rather have quality over quantity.

Speaker 1: 17:05

So, number two, how about let's stop romanticizing hustle, culture or girlboss energy or whatever you want to call it? And of course, as entrepreneurs, we do need to put in the work for our business, but we can do it in a more pleasurable way. Like you'll hear a ton of popular influencers say work hard, suffer, forfeit today for your future. Like please do not sign me up for that. That is not what I want, and hopefully it's not what you want either, because business can be fun. And this is coming from an accountant, a CFO. Of course there's things we have to do sometimes, but thank God for RRT, rapid Resolution Therapy, because I know now how, if I have a task that doesn't seem super pleasurable, like creating a landing page or, you know, figuring out a launch sequence I can now attach pleasure to what would feel good to have done. So that end feeling and then also what's possible to do, because if you don't do that, unconscious mind will actually like fight you and it'll make that task seem really impossible. And so this is what I'm teaching in my membership a lot, and I do RRT sessions. I actually just dropped one for the members on how to, about motivation, because motivation isn't something some people have and some don't. Innovation is actually something we cause in our body. And when I learned that, I was like, oh my God, now I can just do about any task and make it pleasurable, as long as it's possible to do, and would feel good to have done so.

Speaker 1: 18:49

Number three no more obligatory energy. No more selling from scarcity, because everyone and everything is energy. When you show up for your people, like if you're an entrepreneur and you have a membership or you're a course creator when you show up for your people, even on social media out of obligatory energy, like trying to just please algorithm, you're doing no one any favors. They will feel it. And when you decide to sell something because you have a bill to pay, that launch will probably flop or you'll see a lot of refunds, because energy doesn't lie. So instead, sit in silence, ask your higher self or your subconscious mind for help. Ask your guides for help if you believe that. Don't put unnecessary deadlines on yourself. And as an example of this, and then I'll have to wrap up because I actually have a group Q&A with my members.

Speaker 1: 19:47

For example, I no longer use dates when I'm launching and I learned this from Andrea as well because I'm a Virgo, I'm Capricorn If you follow astrology at all, I'm Capricorn Sun, cap or sorry, virgo Sun, capricorn Moon, capricorn, rising Science. So I'm very earthy and sometimes I can be way too literal and so I've taken I used to take what I learned from people in the industry and just try to take what worked for them and make it work for me. And it just doesn't because we're different. So I no longer say like on November 11th my new masterclass will be ready for you, because that puts a ton of pressure on me and I'm a single mom, I have a busy business and I don't like that feeling. So some people like that feeling like it'll actually help them make that happen, and that's fine if that's you, but that's not me.

Speaker 1: 20:42

So instead I take an idea, like if you follow me on social media, I've been thinking about this masterclass for a while now called Uncovering your Unconscious Toxic Money Kinks, or another name for it is dominating or doming your money kinks. So you know, I just created the graphics. I have an idea about it. I posted about it yesterday because it felt fun and I'm just going to start talking about it. I'm going to start planting the seed of what I'm going to be teaching people and then, when I feel ready, I'll fully launch it. So right now I just have a waitlist and if you want to join it, I'll link it in the show notes. There's no, you know, you just sign up for the waitlist and then you'll be notified once it's ready and if you're in my membership, you'll get it for free.

Speaker 1: 21:32

I don't know how much I'll charge, not very much maybe, like well, I don't even want to say it, but not very much. But even then, I'm working with this new process of even when I launch it, the content is not going to be already. Some of it might, but then I'm just really committed to myself to following when the energy feels pleasurable, rich and playful, because that's how I'll give my best work, like today. I had no idea I was going to record this podcast. It just came through and I was like. You know what this feels pleasurable, it feels fun to do and it's possible because I had some time. So you know, for my private clients I'm a fractional CFO for some. You know big companies and small companies, so of course I have to take calls, I have deadlines, but the clients I work with I love, so I'm really excited to be a huge part of their company. If I feel obligatory energy, then I voice it and I either try to shift things with that client or I will let them go. Like Andrea says, no penny from pressure, only pleasure, and like I fully subscribe to that.

Speaker 1: 22:36

So also, when you start to say no to things that aren't serving you, that you don't want whether it's in business relationships, whatever the universe your subconscious gets them a memo and we'll try again. And sometimes you might have to say no a few times, but eventually the vision you have for yourself will collide with what's meant for you, because what's meant for you will not miss you. It can be delayed. If you remain in a fearful state or an obligatory state, you could really delay it, but it will eventually find you. It's up to you whether it finds you faster or it takes longer. So if you want more help with any of this, you can join my 5D CEO Society membership, which is for both entrepreneurs or people who are in a nine to five and want to step out of that into becoming an entrepreneur.

Speaker 1: 23:27

I did that. I love helping other people do that. It really is so much freedom. I break down barriers. I hope you get from step A to step Z. I bring in experts who will support you. Right now it's only 397, but it's not going to stay that way for long. I'm not going to tell you when it's going to change because I don't know. When I know it's the right time. It's going to go up to 497. Then eventually it will go all the way up to 997. So it's a 12 month container where you can just pop in and out as you'd like.

Speaker 1: 24:00

I do live monthly Q&A calls where you can ask me anything. I provide monthly clearings that are infused with rapid resolution therapy on money, on motivation, on whatever it is, and you could submit requests. And then I have guest experts who come in like my shaman, my psychic healers. I'm even going to ask my tax professional to come in to really help you and support you every step of the way. And then I also have pre-recorded trainings in there for what I call the 3D money systems, which is like what business formation should I have? Bookkeeping, like all of that, like from basic to more advanced. And then I have the 5D, which is more of the RRT, the energetics and all of that, because you can only do so much in the 3D world like you really have to start tapping into that 5D version of yourself to collapse time and bring what you're desiring to you so that you're not out there seeking it, it is seeking you.

Speaker 1: 25:07

So I will leave you with that and I hope that was helpful and if it was, please let me know. I would love to know. So have a wonderful rest of your week. Thank you so much for listening to the 5D CFO podcast. If you enjoyed this episode, please share it and tag me on social media. You can find me at Angela Marie Christian on Instagram, facebook and TikTok. If you haven't purchased my bestselling book Manifestation Mastery yet, it's priced at $0.99 on Amazon for the Kindle version.